Soooo. Since I totally stink at updating my personal blog, I would like to direct you lovely readers over to my  new blog. It was partly inspired by a friend who constantly tells me about my gift giving abilities and partly because...I'm taking a class where we are learning about blogging. Rather than go totally personal to total strangers, I'm going to switch over. If you'd like to follow my new blog (I've gone 6 days in a row updating if that tells you anything!) feel free to add me:

The Gift of Gifting

Hope to see everyone there! :)

I know I don't update on this much, but I'm going to try to do little ones more often, especially when there's something going on I want to remember.

I have such an awesome husband.

I came home from work yesterday (which is getting up at 4:15am to get a super quick workout in, being at work before 6am and getting off work at 6pm) to find steak & shrimp kabobs, noodles, and a mixed salad ready and waiting for me.

I went to bed early last night (that's what getting up hours before dawn does to you) only to be woken up a few hours later by my husband. The sky and moon looked pretty and he wanted to take a picture of us kissing in front of it. Who does that?

I'm so grateful he cares and doesn't mind to show me. I'm so grateful that he's so happy to be with me.

I'm not perfect.

I don't say "Amen" anymore.

In a lot of ways, I relate a lot more with non-believers than I do with actual Christians.

I've been screwed more than once by a church or an influential person within the church. Two particular times have essentially scarred me.

The first time was an actual pastor. Without going into details, he purposely withheld me from furthering my spiritual growth. The reasons behind it, I have no idea. My best guess has to do with some sort of politics or dislike of my parents. Either way, I was young and impressionable. Luckily, I was fairly resilient but still. It's never far from my mind and even though this pastor did eventually apologize years later and admit he did wrong,  the scar was still there. I have yet to find a pastor that I fully trust now because I expect to be held back. I can tell that I unconsciously try to not have a personal relationship with a pastor because I don't trust them now.

The second time was the one that really got me. I had just moved up here - somewhere far away from my friends, family, church and comfort zone. I was determined to find a church family that I could settle into - I really thought it would ease the stresses of being in a foreign place (and yes, small towns ARE foreign!). I truly felt like God led me to this one church - I wrote about it in another blog. I became their pianist on Sunday mornings. I loved it. I felt like I had a home. I felt like I belonged in this strange place. I felt like I could be myself and trust people. Then it happened. Small town drama. Someone inside the church got mad at - stay with me here - Brad's aunt's mother...who went to that church. Before you could even say "Praise God", I was out. Out of the position I had come to adore, out of the church that had become familiar. All in an email. Not even the decency to tell me in person. And not another word from anyone in that church since - even when we cross paths in the grocery store.

It's not the money that I wanted or needed. It was feeling like I finally belonged somewhere in this small town of people who all grew up together. And there again went my trust in the church.

I know my mother worries about me. But it's now to the point that I'm scared to go to church. I'm scared to find a comfort zone in a church because I'm scared to be hurt. Churches are supposed to be a place of sanctuary - of peace. It shouldn't cause so much pain. It's even hard for me to witness sometimes - I want people to know about God and how amazing He is - but it's hard for me to ask them to come to church. I feel like I'm lying to them. How can I honestly tell them how wonderful a church family is when I experience so much pain?

I love to go to church anonymously. I love my parents' church in  Charlotte. The pastor there has no idea what my name is, where I live, or anything about me. I feel peace when I walk out of there. Maybe it's because I know she'll never have any idea who I am. I've considered just going to a different church every week. I know that's not what God intended but sometimes I wonder just what He did intend for me.

So that's why I've stopped saying "Amen" after I pray. I've decided that talking to God all the time, all day long, is the best way to figure out what He wants from me. Why do I have to stop talking to Him? Why do I have to essentially say, "signing off, God, talk to you later"? I need Him throughout the day and sometimes throughout the night. I don't want to close the dialogue between God and I. All of the pain that came from the churches were hard enough to deal with and strained our relationship enough. I can't get through this life without my faith so if I can't have a church family then I'm going to have to up the ante with God himself. Maybe if He and I can communicate enough, one day I'll have the nerve to try a church again. But when that day comes, I'm taking it slow. No more going into it assuming that a church family is what is right for me.

Maybe my place in this world is to relate to the people who can't relate to church.

Oh what a wonderful world...

I don't update much, mainly because the only people who really read it are people I talk to on a pretty regular basis...but in case you've missed it -

First and foremost, I am officially a student again! I applied to 3 graduate schools - Shippensburg University for MA in Communications, Mount St. Mary's University for an MBA and then, the long shot beyond long shots, Johns Hopkins University for an MA in Communications. Somewhere along the line, someone thought I was worth taking a chance on and got accepted to Johns Hopkins! I'm registered, books are ordered and I start classes June 8! It's just a huge relief, not only because I really have a direction in life again, but because I only have to be "in person" this semester. Starting in January, anyone will be able to complete the Master's degree completely online and they've already started offering a great deal of classes online. I chose to start off with one this semester and work my way up to a maximum of 3. I'm going to take 1-3 classes each semester (including summers) and if all goes well, I'll graduate in 2012. I'm extremely pumped that I'm going to be at a great school, but I'm also excited because this means we aren't tied to this area until I finish. If we choose to, say, move back to Charlotte this fall (which has been talked about recently! woohoo!), I can still finish my degree in the same length of time. QUITE exciting stuff.

Speaking of Charlotte, I just spent about a week and a half there - the first week or so was with my Momma and then Brad brought the pups down for a few days. We attempted Tabetha's graduation...left the dogs in the garage with the garage window cracked about 5 inches (and a screen).  We managed to get into Monroe, which is about 10 minutes from the graduation site and 30 minutes from where my house is - and got a call from someone asking if we were missing 2 dogs. I thought I was going to throw up. The woman said she had Roxy (although at first Brad thought she said one of them had been hit by a car) but that Chloe ran away. Of all the scenarios, Chloe getting loose is my worst nightmare. She's come a LONG way from when we first got her, but she's still generally terrified of strangers. And cars. And bicycles. You get my point. This wonderful woman stopped traffic so she could herd Roxy into her car and brought her home. About 15 minutes later (of COURSE there was a major accident on 74) she called back to let us know that Chloe was around the back of my unit but still wouldn't come to her. The whole way back, Brad and I just kept praying that she would come back, that she wouldn't get hit by a car, etc. We got back, I jumped out barefoot (I had taken off my heels in case I had to go running through traffic to get Chloe) and, thank God, Chloe and Roxy were sitting on the front steps with this wonderful woman. I did not let them out of my sight for the rest of the trip. We gave them a treat though - they aren't allowed to sleep in our bed with us at home. They can sleep in the bedroom with us, and they have a bed they can sleep in, but we're holding out on letting them actually sleep in the bed with us. In Charlotte, we took my mattress and my guest room mattress to the basement and put them down side by side - then they got to curl up and sleep with us. It was like a family campout!

We go back down this weekend, just Brad and I. The day has finally come that I have to move out of my house. I always knew that day would come - I knew I wouldn't stay in that house forever. It's still very bittersweet though. The selling process has not been a pleasant one. That's all I should probably say at this point. I'm looking forward to finding a house that is actually Brad and I's at some point, although I think we'll probably hang out in our rent-free house for awhile. This opportunity will probably  never come again so we might as well take advantage of us.

My big brother is now engaged! I believe we're looking at an early December wedding. For those that don't know, I set up my brother up with my now future-sister-in-law. After Brad and my close friend Cinnamon both moved from Charlotte within a month of each other, I got involved in a Bible Study at my church. A few months later, I met a girl there who had been seeing a guy at that Study, but it just didn't work out. She still liked the Study though, so she kept coming back. We talked, we hung out a few times and I told her I thought she would be great for my brother. She claimed that she wasn't looking for a relationship and I said okay. We had planned for her to spend the night with me one Friday night - we wanted to have some wine so figured it would be easiest to just not worry about driving. Interestingly enough, my brother called soon after she got there, saying he was in the neighborhood and would I like to have dinner (a fairly common occurrence, he tended to have business down in my neck of the woods every few weeks or so). I told him I was cooking dinner that night because I had a friend over but there was plenty there if he'd like to stop by and join us. He did, and I swear to you, I called my mom after she left on Saturday and told her I saw the sparks. The 3 of us had been sitting at that table but it was really like I wasn't even there - I really just sat back and watched the two of them interact. That Sunday I went to my brother's house to watch a football game with him and his friends and as soon as I walked in the door I told him, "She thinks you're cute and she'd go out with you if you asked her, that's all I'm saying." The next week, he and I went to dinner again, he asked me for her number, and voila. Anyone care to be my next matchmaking conquest? I'm 1-1 now! :)

I've got to get dinner started now - baked tilapia! Maybe I can get back into this on a regular basis again...

I had a rough day.

When I moved up here, I took a part time job as a 911 dispatcher. I like the job much more than I thought I would/am willing to admit - you can't deny that every day is something new. But more importantly, it pays really well for a part time job (better than my old full time job!) and I can sign up only for the hours I want to work. If I want off a week, no biggie, I just don't sign up for that week. That flexibility is nice, especially for when I start school.

It's hard though. Really hard.

Today a call came in almost at the end of my shift that will stay with me forever.

It sounds harsh, but it wasn't the first time I'd taken a call for a person who had died. But this call was completely different.

For the first time, the woman on the other end of the phone started off the call with hope. She called, hoping for help which I did my best to deliver. This time, though, there was a defining moment where she realized her 40 year old husband was not going to wake up and I could hear her world crash down around her in a million pieces. He had laid down for a nap and never woke up. You can clearly tell, in the call, the exact second that she realized there was no hope. It affected me in a way I can't describe.

You can say, "oh yeah, that's terrible". You can say, "oh that poor woman". You can even say, "I know how she feels." But have you ever been *right there* with a person...when they have their personal epiphany that their beloved is gone forever? My thoughts haven't left this woman all night. I made it through the rest of my shift and to my car before I broke down. I had such an adrenaline rush from giving the CPR instructions that it took awhile for me to really let my emotions break free.

They tell us in training not to let the calls get to us - not to let them get personal. I knew I'd have a problem with this but so far it hadn't been too bad. It's never a good thing when a person dies but when the person has lived a long life a part of me tends to feel relief for them.

But when they're young and it clearly takes their spouse by surprise - when you hear that absolute moment that they break down and begin the grieving process - it's an unreal feeling. I've lost family and friends before. I know the pain you feel when you initially realize someone is gone. I also know that there's that numbness you feel. That numbness you *feel* - I can *hear*. It's absolutely heartbreaking and I can't even find a way to describe it. All I can say is that it makes me want to scream to every person I know not to take a single solitary day for granted. This man was 40 years old and never woke up. His widow's life came crashing down in a split second. Her life will never be the same and the next few weeks/months are going to be a total and complete hell. I have no idea who these people are but I've sobbed more for them since my shift ended than I've cried in a very long time. I'm grieving for them because I can't even imagine the shock and despair that she must feel right now.

This one hit me and hit me hard. I pray that no one who reads this will ever have to hear that moment where someone hits their rock bottom - but at the same time, it takes me to that Tim McGraw song - Live Like You Were Dying. No day is guaranteed. Not yours, not your family, not your friends and not your enemies. Don't live with regrets. Don't live "meaning" to do things. Just do them. Tell the ones you love that you love them every chance you get. Be unselfish.

If you ever  hear someone's heart break, you'll understand how I feel right now. It's one thing for your own heart to break. It's another thing entirely to hear someone else's heart break. It's even a different thing if you have a vested interest. I am a total and complete stranger. I almost feel like I was intruding on her personal moment. I share in her pain now. Obviously I can't feel half of the heartache that she feels right now but  I bear a lot of grief alongside with her. I wasn't able to help her. They tell me there was nothing I could have done - that he was probably already gone before she dialed the numbers. But just this once, I wanted so badly to help her. To prove them all wrong. That love can conquer all. But I'm not God.

This job may not be how I want to spend the rest of my career - but it's teaching me things that no 9-5 job could ever possibly come close. It's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life. It can be ripped away in a split second.

Emotionally exhausted

A few things to get off my chest...

Even though no one really reads this :)

1. I have decided that I am vehemently opposed to forcing literature in school. Mind you, I love reading and I loved my English/Literature classes all through college - but I still don't think they should be forced. I don't think there's much that makes me more angry than to hear people say they "hate" reading. I take it as a personal challenge. Very few people in the world truly "hate" reading. They've just been forced to read things that they're not interested in for so long that they assume everything out there is ridiculously mind numbing. Reading and analyzing Jane Eyre might be fascinating fun for someone who say, wants to pursue a career in English/Literature. To most of the rest of us, it's not fun, not entertaining, and not something we want to do ever again. Yet if you give someone a book with something they're interested in, it's funny how their outlook on reading changes. Like a girl who "hates reading" but gets hooked on Nicholas Sparks (how can you NOT??) - she hated reading but when she was introduced to a book that interested HER, she can't get enough. Or my own husband, who hated reading - but when you get him some books about the Secret Service/FBI/Presidential details - he'll sit out on the beach all day with a book in his hand.

It kind of infuriates me that there are so many English/Literature professors out there who don't seem to care about making reading enjoyable - or something that people will continue doing after they graduate. I understand that there are "standards", but why use only the standards? Why not throw in a book or two that might actually engage students and make them interested? Other than English majors, how many people will find reading Beowulf exciting? And would want to find more books like that to read? I wish they would focus more on making reading something FUN for students - reading is something you can enjoy for the rest of your life, but the way they make most curriculums these days they are just tearing people away from it.

2. We're a month into having our two pups in the house and they've totally changed my life forever :) We've discovered that they are not the breeds that the shelter told us - Chloe is a Basenji mix - probably with a shepherd but that's not her primary breed. A girl at our obedience class mentioned that she looked like a Basenji so we went home and did some research and it's pretty much dead on. She has the biggest ears in the world. She's the quickest dog we've ever seen. Roxy is a fast dog, but Chloe leaves her in the dust. We think she'd make a great search-and-rescue dog: if you pretend to fall and be hurt, she will stop at nothing to get to you and just curl up beside you. I buried Brad in blankets and pillows and she went nuts getting him out of there. She loves nothing more than to have her belly scratched and makes friends with all dogs - even the bull mastiff at obedience class that could crush her with one paw! Now if we could get her to trust people in the same way, we'll be okay! We suspect she was abused in her previous home. The papers the former owners filled out stated that she was good with small children and lived with them - but she's absolutely terrified of them so we think there was some cruelty going on. She gets better every day though!

Roxy is a Plott Hound/Retriever mix. I maintain that she has some boxer in her. The way she stands at attention sometimes is IDENTICAL to a boxer. On a walk the other day Brad even said from a distance she looks like one. She has such pretty brindle coloring. She's extremely easy going and thinks that everyone is her best friend. If you pass her and don't stop to pet her or scratch her ears, she gets this mopey look on her face. She's become very protective of Chloe - when Chloe gets what Roxy considers "too close" to another dog at obedience, Roxy jumps in to "protect" her. Even when they're standing beside each other at obedience, they need to be closer. We probably could have saved a lot of money on beds and crates and just got one since they tend to want to sleep together anyway. 

And now some pretty little pictures of our pretty little pups! :)

Curled up together in one crate

We found Daddy!

More to come later, I'm sure.

3. Just a quick one. Don't tell someone you will write a letter of recommendation, only to find that with a week to go before all the material needs to be in, that you NEVER WROTE IT! Of course, it happens to be the one school that I really want to attend too...just figures!

Silly me.

Here I've been, trotting along with a closed off blog. Whoops! Thank you, Lindsay, for pointing out *with attitude* that you would like to read my blog again :)

Let's see, what's new. Training is trudging along. Nothing too exciting but at least once it's over I'll get to work whenever I want. I think all companies should adopt the "sign up for whatever hours you want to work" policy. If I want to work 60 hours one week, I can, overtime included. If I don't feel like working at all one week, I just don't sign up for hours. I just have to work 12 hours a month to keep all my certifications. Easy enough!

All the applications are in to all the schools, all the transcripts are in, I'm just waiting to hear back now. We shall see.

I put applications in on two dogs yesterday. One was a border collie (we were the 2nd application and I found out today that he was adopted yesterday). The other was a German Shepherd mix - we are the first application on her but Brad hasn't met her yet. He meets her tomorrow so we'll see how that goes. I love her but he has his heart set on a collie so we'll have to wait and see. I don't think we're ready for 2 dogs yet :)

I wish I had more to say but alas, I guess that's all for now. If you've missed my entries, they should all be visible now!

Yesterday was productive - Yay!

Well my husband finally made it home yesterday. He works at the top of a steep, curvy, mountainous road so when there's snow it's always a toss up. We went riding around, looking at the town and boy did I not know the damage that had been done.

I'm not *happy* that my next door neighbor was taken to the hospital...but we are incredibly lucky that our road was plowed early yesterday morning as a result. The road was melting and it made it really easy for us to get out of the house and get into town. I couldn't believe how many roads were shut down. The interstate was shut down - tractor trailers were having to sleep on the road, cars were being forced to make U-turns to go southbound. Neighborhoods were completely snowed in -by that I mean, there was so much snow the plows couldn't get in...and even when the plows could get in, the snow drifts were filling everything up with snow. It's going to be at least another week before life returns to normal up here. We might be close to Baltimore and DC, but it's still a small town. Not exactly at the top of their "dig them out" list. I'm wondering if my job will even start on Monday.

On that note, school stuff is pretty much complete.

Johns Hopkins application stuff got sent off on Monday (Masters of Communications degree) - I'm sure it hasn't made it yet because the mail hasn't been running, but at least it's off. The only thing lacking on it is the reference letters and I'm going to try to follow up with them next week to make sure they got them in. The big thing with them is 1) It's a big name school and 2) Starting next January I can finish my degree fully online. Meaning if we move somewhere, I don't have to try to figure out my school situation again.

I've got Shippensburg complete and ready to go (Masters of Communications). My biggest concern with them is 1) what they show on their website as their requirements and what they sent in a letter as their requirements...don't match up. I specifically chose programs that I didn't have to take the GMAT or the GRE. (Well, as long as you had a certain undergraduate GPA that is) They're saying I need test scores but I'm hoping they just didn't get the transcript yet.

I submitted Widener yesterday (Law school). If I can't get in there, I probably can't get in anywhere. Taking the LSAT 2 weeks before the wedding probably wasn't the smartest way to go about it - and I said as much in the essay. I've heard if you don't have strong scores, it's a good thing to try to explain why. So I did.

And on a last minute whim last night I applied for Mount St. Mary's University (MBA with a concentration in Marketing). The Mount is a really local university just up the road (it's where we work out also), it's reasonably priced and, again, they didn't require a GMAT OR GRE if you had over a 3.4 gpa. I'll probably wind up having to take more prerequisites because I didn't take many business courses in undergraduate...but I think I'll be okay. Brad took plenty of business courses and I think I could figure it out. One of my references from Wingate doesn't think I should shoot for an MBA, but I dunno. It could work for me.

I think the hardest thing is - I can't pinpoint what I want to do with my life. Well, I take that back, I know what I'd LIKE to do with my life, but it's not exactly something that makes sense at this point in my life. We're not settled yet, especially if we wind up moving again soon. I also don't know what is smarter - to just get a degree anywhere...or try to get it from a big name school. I didn't go to a big name school - I went to a small school no one has ever heard of. I don't know if it's in my best interests to just GET a degree...or get one from a school that you've heard of.

Well, those are my options for now. Hopefully the mail will start running soon and I'll be able to get all this stuff in the mail.

Off to wake up the hubby!

Craziest week of my life so far.

You'd think that being stranded would have given me a million reasons to blog more. But for some reason...I found other things to do. :)

First off, I got the crazy exciting news that my best friend is getting MARRIED!!!

The future Mike & Kristi Beabout!

I'm beyond excited to start focusing on a new wedding! This time I just get to go along for the ride instead of being center of attention which I'm pretty pumped about :) Still waiting on a date but it's looking like August or September in Richmond. I'm incredibly honored to be her Matron of Honor (along with cousin Kelli as Maid of Honor). And because we all love ring shots...

Mike done good :)

Then we have this insane snowstorm that's been banging the crap out of us. Last weekend was pretty crazy but apparently mother nature was just warming us up for "The Big One". 

During one of the few moments I could see across the street

Now, I grew up in the mountains and I have seen snow - contrary to what people up here seem to think (every time we get snow I get a ton of "Well, I guess this is the most snow you've ever seen, huh?"  Yeah, not even close). This came pretty close though. The state shut down (or attempted to shut down) all the roads. They even threatened to fine people who ended up driving on the roads. I don't blame them. If I can't see my car, parked in the carport, because of the wind and snow, how on earth do you think you're going to be able to see another car or the end of the road? Crazy people. So not only was the wind howling like crazy and snow blowing like the Tundra...but I was here alone. Brad got snowed in at work. Nights like that I am SO glad I lived on my own for 3 years. I could've easily gotten freaked out but I just stretched out in our nice comfy king bed and had a slumber party with myself. Ahhh.

Then there's this morning. I was laying in bed, not sure if I *really* wanted to get up yet (I knew I wouldn't be leaving the house anytime soon)...when I heard...the *beepbeepbeep* of a large truck. My first thought was, "No WAY they're picking up trash today!! NO WAY!" So I go to the window and see a dump truck...behind it is a plow vehicle...behind it is...a fire truck? Then an ambulance. Then another emergency vehicle. They plow our road and wind up...next door. And someone next door got sent to the hospital. I called Brad's mom because it's an elderly lady who lives next door and she's good friends with Brad's grandmother (whose house we are currently living in).  They didn't seem to be in TOO big of a hurry, which I hope is a good sign. I texted Brad to find out what's going on (he gets texts from Dispatch for all emergency calls) and he said it was because someone had trouble breathing. The elderly lady's daughter and a few of her children live there too - mind you, her daughter is selling drugs out of the basement so it could have been her that the ambulance was called for. But anyways, that's the drama of today so far. My road is probably the only road in town that is plowed though, so that's good for Brad if he's able to come home tonight.

Sorry for the blur, I took them with my computer because I can't find the cord to my camera.

At least the sun is shining and the skies are blue, right?

Why do I suddenly feel like I'm back in high school?

I just submitted my graduate applications for Shippensburg University and Johns Hopkins University. Obviously JHU would be my first choice but if I'm being honest with myself - what's the odds I'll actually get accepted?


Today's goals: Get my transcript requests to Wingate, get my Letters of Recommendations out to an old professor and employer, and finalize my essay & resume.


And we're off!

My Bucket List

The only place I had this saved was on myspace, which I never do anymore so I'm bringing it over here...

The Blind Side

My parents gave hubby some movie tickets for Christmas this year. We're not real big movie-theater people (I HATE how people talk/text/etc all through a movie that I just paid $10 to see!) but hey, give us some free tickets and we can find a way to use them!


He's been gone a lot lately because he's helping a co-worker finish his basement. Normally I would be fine with this but it's a little different when I sit at home all day bored and then have to sit home all night bored too. When I start a job/school and start to make friends up here it'll be fine and dandy. Last night he reserved the evening for "date night". We went out to eat and then headed down to Gaithersburg to go see The Blind Side. 


That movie was...phenomenal.


If it's not the best movie I've ever seen, it's right up there with the best of them. I laughed, I cried, I was oblivious to the packed movie theater all around me. Yes, as long as this movie has been out, it was a nearly sold-out show.


Leigh Anne Tuohy is my new idol. Just a sassy Southern woman who knows what she wants and goes after it with this matter-of-fact stance on life. At one point in the movie I looked over at Brad (yes, I broke my own pet peeve in the movie theater) and told him I want to be her.


It would have been a good movie even if it hadn't been a true story. What made it a great movie is that it is a true story. 


It's the ultimate feel-good movie. There were parts of it I wondered if it really happened or if it was just added to make it a better movie. Then I came home and did some research only to find that no, it really DID happen.


Excuse me now, I believe I'm going to go out and save the world...

Ughhhhhhhh

Dear Windstream and/or Dish Network,


You truly do suck at life. 


I'm so sorry I tried to make my life simpler by getting my phone/cable/internet packaged under one umbrella of Windstream.


Pardon me for calling to cancel in November when I get my bill only to be told I must be charged for yet another month (completely useless since no one was living there) because I missed the dreaded cycle date by one day.


Pardon me for calling after Christmas to question why I received yet another bill from Windstream after I supposedly cancelled over a month prior.


Pardon me for calling Dish after I get a $100 bill from them only to be told that "Well, Windstream should have told you that you needed to call us directly to cancel."


Pardon me for getting pissy when you tell me that I have 30 days to return the remotes, receiver and satellite.


Pardon me that the guy stuck the dish on the 3rd floor roof of my house - he used a ladder to get onto my deck, then used the ladder on the deck to get to the roof. I am NOT risking MY life because your installer-dude decided to be spiderman.


Pardon me that the remotes and receivers are 7 HOURS from where I am now.


Pardon me that the whole reason I called to cancel in NOVEMBER is because I was moving out of the state.


Congratulating me on my marriage is not going to put me in a better mood. Nice try homefry.


Absolutely not, I do not want your services moved to my house here. After this bullcrap? ABSOLUTELY NOT.


Did I mention that my house is nice and locked up with a realtor's lockbox on it? Yeah. My spare key is IN THAT BOX. Therefore, having someone "run over" to get it isn't going to work.


I hate you both and will never use your stinking services again.


Have a wonderfully dreadful day.

Owie.

Well, I certainly can't move right now.


I'm loving the gym access. Wednesday I did 45 minutes of cardio and a half hour of weightlifting. Thursday I ran for 30 minutes then got in the pool and swam for 20 minutes. Yesterday I did the elliptical for 30 minutes (hard, too, man, I think I got in competition with one of the basketball players in there!) and then the stairmaster (gotta get that booty into shape!) and finished with some weightlifting. And now I'm paying for it. I think it's a good thing it's closed today and tomorrow. If the weather's still nice tomorrow I think I might try to go for a slow run out but we'll see. I forget sometimes that I'm not in shape like I was in college - I try to go at the same pace as back then and I wind up majorly hurting. Oh well, it's good for me :)


I've been working on my book/album of pictures from the wedding. I have 3 regular albums that have all of the wedding pictures in it but my photographer had told me about a book that you can create with the wedding pictures. He offers it but he knew I liked doing graphic design stuff so he just told me where I could do it. I'm lacking two pages and I don't know how to finish it - I still have so many pictures I want to use! But it's been great because I can use all the "detailed" pictures as backgrounds...but still have the main pictures front and center. I'm probably going to wait until I actually start my job to send it off and purchase it, but still. It's exciting to know it's coming along! I think I drive Brad crazy because I could look at the pictures over and over again and never get tired of it.


Speaking of the job...I met with the psychologist for what I think was my final "test" on Wednesday. It was pretty interesting. Apparently I'm normal (no comments from the peanut galley!). Brad found it hysterical that the psychologist told me I should consider a career in law enforcement though. I guess my "curl up like a turtle" defensive response doesn't impress him much. The job starts in February...I wouldn't mind if it started a little sooner but oh well. The first 8 weeks or so will be intense, full-time training but at least I'll be making bank for it. I'm going to try to work all the hours I can until I start school. Between my house selling soon (hopefully-it went on the market Tuesday!) and the money I can save with working this part time job I'm hoping to be able to save enough for the whole master's degree before I even start. Plus, Brad's uncle (who will be my boss) said they get a lot of college students who work there - when times are slow, we're allowed to do our classwork. So basically I'm getting paid almost $20 an hour to do my classwork. Niiiiiice! It's definitely nothing I want to turn into a full-time career, but we can easily live on Brad's salary so it'll be nice to have mine for school so I don't have to apply for loans. As much as I wanted to fight the whole thing, it seems to be working out fairly well so far. 


98 days since we've been married. I still feel like we're just "playing house!"

My life in prison.

The day my future child decides to play high school sports is apparently the day my prison career will begin.


Maybe I was naive (okay, I know I was naive, that was stupid). Maybe I didn't notice when I was younger. But it's the parents that are out of control these days.


Brad's cousin is a freshman in high school and got bumped up to play varsity basketball this year. I personally think she's pretty awesome so I go when I can to support her, even if Brad can't come along. 


Every game I have felt like starting a fight.


One game it was a girl on the opposite team. Okay, so she was good. But she was so obnoxious about it. Sweetie, you're a senior in high school. You might be the only person on your team now who can play but next year, when you go to college, you will be nothing. So all those NBA winks/fistpumps/screams aren't going to fly when you are sitting on the bench. Enjoy it while you can, darling, I'm just saying.


Last night was the icing on the cake. The girls on the opposite team were just playing dirty. They were pushing, punching, slapping - and nothing was being called. Their parents were whooping and hollering from the stands, encouraging it. I saw one girl in particular who, as one of our girls would shoot, she would punch them in the back - she obviously knew that the refs were looking up to call the fouls, not down. You could tell that T (Brad's cousin) was getting pissed. After one particular incident where a girl shoved T, you could see that she was done with it. The next time she had the ball, she went barreling down that court - that girl tried to stand in her way but T just clocked her. I mean, this girl went down like you see in the movies. Luckily the refs called the foul on the other girl. 


All of this was annoying but the worst was towards the end of the game. It was pretty close - which meant, of course, that tensions were high. T stole the ball and went heading down the court to do a layup. A girl from the other team came up beside her and just shoved her into the wall - hard. Mind you, this girl went into the wall too - and apparently hurt her knee. I was sitting with T's mom and we just saw her neck snap back. She got up and shook it off like a champ but that other girl's mom threw a hissy fit like you have never seen before. They ended up calling an intentional technical foul on that other girl (uh, duh) and their side went into uproar. 


See, my big problem is this. One, the refs should have done a better job. If they hadn't let the game get out of control, it wouldn't have escalated to that point. But the other team just played a dirty game - once our team realized nothing was being called, they started playing dirtier too. Two, the other team's parents were cheering anytime their team hurt or assaulted our team. How can you encourage your children to do that? If I were a parent and I saw my child down there on the court, playing dirty and intentionally trying to hurt another person - you'd better believe I'd be down there in 5 seconds flat, yanking their butts off the court myself. 


Those kids are being taught that it's okay to play a dirty game. That's not helping them in life. Do you not want them to play in college? Because that crap might fly in a small town high school game -  but when you get into a higher level, they're either going to get called for it or they're going to shove the wrong girl and wind up seriously hurt themselves.


Seriously, I think you should have to take a test to reproduce sometimes.

Lots of updates!

Whew, time gets away from you sometimes.


Christmas was strange this year - it was weird having Brad there with me on Christmas morning but it was still nice. He thoroughly enjoyed the benefits of having "two" Christmases :). It was exhausting with all the traveling so I'm glad next year we'll have Christmas with my family a week or two early. Two days in a row + 7 hours traveling both ways = cranky, sleepy me!


His aunt and uncle got us a membership to use a local university's recreational facilities for 6 months which I am extremely excited about. We activated it on Tuesday and I went up there yesterday to do cardio and weightlifting. It's different from a gym in that there's not rows and rows of cardio equipment but at least it's not very crowded and I also have access to the pool, sauna, indoor track and indoor tennis courts. I think today I'm going up to do laps in the pool. I'm planning on going to Richmond in March to run a 10k with my bff, Kristi - she's been trying to get me to run it for years so now that I'm this close to her I'm going to take advantage of it :)  I'm guessing it's similar to Cooper River which is always fun. It's one of those races you don't even really have to train for because you're not going for time - the race itself is so huge you're just taking in all the sights around you. 


My first birthday as a married woman was fantastic. I heard from people I hadn't heard from in years, wishing me a happy birthday. That morning I got up and went skiing by myself - it was PERFECT conditions. Sunny, warm but not *too warm*, no snow blowing and very few people on the slopes. I literally would ski down the mountain and ski straight back onto the lift. I went inside and had a cup of hot chocolate and looked out, enjoying the day. Brad came back from the co-worker's house he's renovating in the early afternoon and we finished taking all the Christmas stuff down (yes, I know, we're terrible haha). I had assumed we would go to Carrabba's for my birthday - it's my favorite restaurant and his mom had given me a gift card for there for Christmas. But he said no, he wanted to take me somewhere special - that the gift card will be used later but it was a gift for me and shouldn't be used on my birthday. So I got dressed while he was in the shower - khaki's, a nice sweater and heels. He comes out of the shower, kind of looks at me, and goes, "ummm, you might want to get more dressed up than that." I almost fainted. This coming from the man who acts like it's torture to put on anything remotely "nice". I get dressed in 'appropriate' attire and we head out to Frederick. We pull up to a restaurant I've only ever heard of, The Dutch's Daughter. It. Was. Phenomenal. I ordered a glass of wine, Brad ordered a Gentleman Jack & Coke. He ordered an appetizer of scallops wrapped in bacon (delicious!). I ordered a main course of blackened salmon (soooo sweet and HUGE portion) and added a crab cake (they weren't kidding, it actually was all crab!) and it came with green beans (it was meant to be) and twice baked potatoes (yummmy!). He got the filet mignon which was like eating bread it was so tender. It was just a fantastic meal. We were seated by one of the fireplaces and the place itself was so elegant. Listening to the conversations around us was quite entertaining since they were all big businessmen from DC who had come in on a Tuesday night to eat there. But all in all, it was an absolutely wonderful birthday.


I don't really do resolutions - but last night Brad and I were watching a special about a man who had himself dropped into the Yukon rainforest to see if he could survive by himself for 3 months. I wouldn't say there was anything *miraculous* about his documentary...but it did flip a switch inside me somewhere. Watching this man try to survive on his own with no other human contact was heartbreaking. Even though he woke up each morning with the most beautiful scenery, you could see his inner turmoil from missing his loved ones. So this year I'm going to try to appreciate everything. I'm going to appreciate that I have a husband, even when he picks on me, because I know he loves me. I'm going to make more of an effort to maintain my close friendships because I truly enjoy them and don't want them to "fall away" because of distance. I'm going to try and find the beauty in each day and thank God that I have another day. "Hippie-ish" or not, I'm going to try.


This was a pretty random update but I'll try to do better from now on. I'm just enjoying this whole married lifestyle, that's all :)